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Q & A

Would you feel hurt, offended, angry if a friend came over to your house...their cell phone rings...and they proceed to talk 20 mins or so?

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Best Answer

6 words for this friend....

GET OUT AND CALL ME LATER.


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I would indeed. That is so rude! That is as selfish as riding in a car with someone and they are on their phone, ignoring you.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • It happens! I have a friend who just shows up unanounced, I make a pot of coffee, stop whatever I’m doing, sit down to visit with her, her phone rings and........Next thing you know she’s run out of time (my time) and she’s gone.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Fxydiva wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Yeah, I think I would, especially if she and I were already having a conversation prior to her cell phone ringing!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I have a friend that comes by once a week or so. This happens every time. At first it did not bother me. Now I feel it is just plain RUDE! If my phone rings, and it is not an emergency, I get right off.  

      and she talks loudly about what they did or are going to do. Or why the husband sucks and the other guy...OI




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • It’s almost as if people forget how to talk to you face to face!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Darla5 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • That is so rude  . Now, if my business phone rings most friends understand because of the real estate business. Even then I try to let voice mail pick up and call all of them back at one time. In our business if the phone rings it is business. Lord let the phone ring. The market is so slow.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • YES! Rude, very rude...People have lost their minds with all the cell phone madness.
      Unless there was an emergency of course.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Also, I hate when someone calls me on my cell and I don’t answer. So then they call my house and I don’t answer. Later, when we finally talk, they make this whole big deal about “calling you and you didn’t answer your phone“. That’s what voicemail is for. There are times when I don’t want to be bothered and I don’t have to explain that to anyone.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • It is a good friend, I think.

      My post disappeared. lol

      She is also the type that calls and proceeds to talk to all behind her. Then why friggen call me. I hate that.

      The un-disabled me would have told her straight away. The disabled me is not sure what to do. I do not have many in my area that are able to help me, and am afraid if I tell her it’s rude, she will get all flamed. Wow, that makes me sound pathetic!!

      I have never been one to back down or cater to anyone...so why now?




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Girl I have been known not to open my door if someone shows up unanounced...lol! I love to see friends and family but I also value my privacy.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • My husbands cousin does that when we‘re on the phone. She sounds like a parrot, repeating everything I say.
      She used to put you on speaker when you called. I never realized it until oneday I was about to talk about something girly and her guy said something to me and I realized he had been listening the whole time! I then said how much I hate when people put you on speakerphone when you don’t know it, so now she does the parrot thing! ARGH!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Mztracy, no you don’t sound pathetic. She sounds pretty pathetic though.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • If you tell her and she get upset enough to feel like she can’t help you let her go. you are a beautiful intelligent woman who deserves friends that do for you because they love you and want to do for you. You don’t have to settle for less because of your disability.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Five0, I knew someone that would do that and you would see her sitting in the living room. I loved her for that! When she said call first, you’d better call!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • hate the speakerphone!! lol

      ty carol...i am just stuck as it pisses me off it hurts and now i do not even want her coming by.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Tracy, girl, tell her! If she’s a good friend she will understand and it won’t offend her.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Bobbi Bacha wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I would unless it was an emergency or if they have a business they run via cell phone, then they need to make sure all friends know that they run a business on the cell and things like that may happen, but Id make up by buying Lunch or treat my friend so something special for having to wait.

      May I add just to talk is plain rude... and speaker phone.. thats gone over the edge.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I am kind of a shut in. I realized a few days ago, i can no longer drive...safely. And she is really the only one who can get me out during the day.  

      This happens when we are shopping, out at lunch, or just hanging in my house.  

      This confuses me so much.I mean am i bad not saying anything for fear of her getting mad? See if she gets flamed or gives me the ‘attitude’ then I will be waaaaaay to honest with her. Then i really am shut in. Does this make sense?

      This really sucks!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Inakika wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Okay! Especially without telling you. And she wonders why I don’t call her often.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Almostfive0 wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Mztracy, try talking to her calmly first. You sound like this is building up and if you‘re anything like me when you do that it’ll end with you blowing up and saying things that you can’t retract...that’s not good.

      So just tell her how it’s making you feel. If she trips then you have a decision to make.

      Either you get used to her being rude or if it bothers you too much you need to let her go.

      If you really feel you need her help and don’t have anyone else to fill the need that she provides you with, then you may need to put up with it and just look at her as someone that’s helping you out and not really a close friend.
      Try to take your emotions out of the relationship and see it for what it really is.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Coachmombabe wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I think it would depend on what the call was about. I can’t imagine any of my friends just chatting away in that circumstance. It would have to be something important.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Just a thought: How about hand signaled her to a room, shut the door and let her talk while you get back to your live as if she was not there.  Then when she is done, tell her sorry, she has missed the time that is up with visiting you?  I am wondering.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Good ideas carol. It’s hard as she is they type to not listen to everything and interrupt etc. when she does not like the topic. But, I have to do something, or yup just deal with it.

      coachmom she just chit-chats. no emergency, usually about how terrible hubz’s are etc.  

      chinadoll - that is a good idea too.  

      maybe just hang with her when we actually go out, then i can just go do my thing while she is on the phone...




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • Jackie...come over the next time she is here!!!!

      and if it was an emergency i’d be all over it with her.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Michelle Rowe wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • If they told me ahead of time that they were expecting a very important business call or even a family member was sick, etc. It would be rude if it was a call they weren’t expecting and they took the call for 20 minutes.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Stephanie Wolf wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • I do understand that some conversations are extremely necessary, such as ill family members, doctor/patient situations, etc, but they should excuse themselves to a more private area and try to end the call in a timely manner, usually saying they can call them back later on.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Leeann wrote Nov 25, 2008
    • One of my friends came by and pick me up to take me out to lunch she told me I need to get out of the house, because I need a break from taking care of my very sick mother. The cell phone rang and she talk the whole way in the car to a friend. It was rude. I keep my mouth shut. When we sat down to lunch the cell phone rang again. Some people can’t put the phone down. I have lunch with my other friends now.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Linni wrote Nov 26, 2008
    • well, like it was mentioned earlier..justbcz said it. i have a friend or two that are just like family and will answer thier phone and talk, and i am VERY cook with it! it does not bother me at all.

      Now for me, when my cell phone rings, I DO NOT ANSWER IT! lol i have voice mail, and ifin they want to leave a message, they will! if not they will call back till they get me!

      for all others, YES, it is rude, and i would never answer my phone at a ” new friends ” place, or if we went for coffee.. just let it ring!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Nov 26, 2008
    • I do that to my clients and friends.  I deliberately turned off my cell phone in front of them and said,“I’d better turn this off for I like to give you undivided attention.” If you do that, perhaps hopefully, they will get the hint.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mztracy wrote Nov 26, 2008
    • linni, she is someone who i have known for 13 years. I love her mom, and miss her dad r.i.p. Her family is ok.

      i cannot go and cook, or do other things. she comes over so we can hang out, w/o kids etc. we watch movies, play on the pc’s, eat lunch, etc. But now, it’s her on the phone almost the whole time she is here. or texting people, im‘ing. So my thing is, why even come over.  

      I have decided to just hang with her when we actually go out. If she wants to spend her time on the phone, fine i will go off and do my own thing. lol

      I think because I would not do this, to me it is rude no matter hwo close we are.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      (華娃娃) ChinaDoll wrote Nov 26, 2008
    • Were you able to tell her your true feeling about this?




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Coachmombabe wrote Nov 26, 2008
    • Okay, so this is not rhetorical. I think my conversation with her might go something like this:

      “Honey (I call everyone that), you know I love you and I treasure our friendship. You are there for me in ways no one else is, and I can’t begin to tell you how much I appreciate all you do for me. And I know you love me too, that’s why I feel like I can be completely honest with you. I used to look forward to our visits. I don’t think you do this intentionally, but more and more, when you come over to see me, then spend the majority of your time on the phone, it hurts my feelings. I begin to feel unimportant, and more than a little disrespected.

      Could we come to an agreement on when you accept your calls when we are together? Like maybe, when we‘re out and I’m taking care of my errands? That way we can maximize our time together. What do you think?”

      Just an idea! :o)

      Happy Thanksgiving!




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