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anonymous Anonymous

Q & A

anyone else ever have to turn a parent in to the DMV b/c they shouldn’t be driving and won’t stop?



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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • No! And I’m sorry if you were forced to do that...must be tough!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anonymous wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • yes, we were-both are usually the most considerate and caring people, but on this subject it’s like they make a total 180.  i know they‘re frightened, but we’ve begged, pleaded and reasoned on many levels and the walls would listen better.  so we gave them a deadline, still nothing and we were given no choice.  now “you’ve killed your dad, you know that.”

      but what about the potential saving of lives????  he’s had numerous fender-benders, ran a red light and if my mom doesn’t repeat something constantly-he is constantly asking “what am I doing, where am I going, why am i doing this?”
      and yet her answer is always “I’ve got it under control, he’s fine, I won’t let anything happen.”

      ??




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Vikki Hall wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • I know it has a lot to do with them feeling like they are losing control which malso means they are officially old.

      Sending you hugs whoever you are!estatic




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anonymous wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • thanks-we know a lot of the venom is indeed fear-but that doesn’t make it right.  Knowing how they are, when (not if)the big accident would take place, they’d be horrified, mortified and would never forgive themselves for causing something catastrophic and not realizing before it was to late that they should have done the right thing on their own.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mzd3 wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • Dear Annonymous, just know that you are doing the right thing, saving lives heart




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Kimberly Grey wrote Jun 25, 2010
    • yes, we did. My father in law. We went to DMV after he had fallen asleep more than the DMV wanted to know was when they took away his license!!! We were lucky no one was hurt!!!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Jun 26, 2010
    • It’s very hard for them to give up that control!  It’s too bad they don’t recognize the potential harm they could cause to themselves or others on the road.  You do what you have to do.  Don’t feel bad about it! You are doing the right thing!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Wookiemom09 wrote Jun 26, 2010
    • No - my ex mother in law was fighting us until the day she turned the wrong way down a one way street and almost caused a major accident.  She pulled over, got out of the car and asked a business to call us.  She handed my ex hubby her keys and drivers license.  She was devestated but realized for her safety and others, it was for the best.  We had already checked into what it would take to get it taken away.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Yana Berlin wrote Jun 27, 2010
    • We had to do that with my grandpa when he was in his early eighties. He fought us all the way, but he only became a driver at sixty, and he was never good at it to begin with, you can only imagine his driving abilities in his eighties.

      I was very sad for him, but we knew that it was the right thing to do for other people around him when he drives.

      I told my kids that I will make a detailed document of everything I can and can’t do up to a certain age, I will notarize it and place it in my house for me to see daily, hopefully when I reach that age when I don’t know better, maybe this will be engraved in my head and I’ll give up the control without the fight, making it a bit easier for my children.

      After all, looking at my grandma, she remembers everything that happened to her all her life, but the last 10 years are gone, I want to prevent that from happening.

      Wishful thinking on my part????




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Jun 27, 2010
    • Unfortunately it is wishful thinking Yana.  I wish I could say differently.  The rate of people being diagnosed with alzheimers is unbelievable.  Soon it will pass all diseases out there.  

      Right now...if you are diagnosed with cancer, you might can treat it and recover.  With alzheimers, there is no cure and there is no treating it and recovering.  

      The best advice I can give after dealing with a mother who had it for 12 years is to get all of your legal affairs in order and keep them up to date.  

      The rest is out of you control....unfortunately...frown




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Anonymous wrote Jun 27, 2010
    • Here’s an update for you-my sis called and my mom (who sure didn’t apologize) told her that this letter actually came from the DMV b/c of the red light he sped through! Ours hasn’t been done, yet!  How do you like that!?!  Turns out that b/c of his age, the red light and the several fender benders they want him to have a complete and thorough evaluation to see if he can be cleared by a doctor.

      So yes, she knows we sent in the forms, but this was the state saying “hey buddy, time for you to give up the keys”

      We‘re still “s—t” but if we are, so is the state!




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