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I need some advice on how to handle a situation with my boss. We had a disagreement about two weeks ago during my evaluation and I stopped the meeting when she started bullying me and took the concern to my union reps. I then asked my boss if she would like to continue the evalution and she told me no. Now my boss is not speaking to me...no hellos, no goodbyes and very little work related discussions. She also is locking her office door when she leaves which she has never done before. This is a very unprofessional way for a manager to act and makes for a very uncomfortable working environment. How would you handle this situation?

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mindy Wilson wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Wow~ tough! You have already contacted your union reps...Is there another supervisor? I would contact the reps again and honestly if the situation can’t be resolved...I’d begin looking for other work!

      Poor you!

      Mindy




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angell Villafañe wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Thanks Mindy...I believe I could probably take it to her supervisor next. I love my job and I have been here for 17 years so I really don’t want to look for another job...awesome pay and benefits! I wish she could be the one to leave. She is not well liked around here at all. She has been nothing but a bully to everyone but they insist on keeping her.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mindy Wilson wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • How awful! I guess you could try to talk to her again and see if she’ll respond. Shoot...it makes it miserable to go to work if a person dreads issues!

      Mindy




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Suzann wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Angell, it sounds like you are doing everything “right.” The ball is in your supervisor’s court. Since you’ve been there 17 years AND your supervisor is not well liked in the first place, I think if you just graciously stand your ground and keep doing “the next right thing,” eventually it will work itself out.

      I’m sorry to hear that you‘re going through such a difficult situation.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Rachel Gordon wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • I know how unpleasant this can be as I have been through a similar situation myself.  I ended up leaving my job because of it but I don’t know if I may have handled it differently today.

      I think what I would do today in a similar situation is to take the advice given by the other Fab 40 ladies but I would also pray for this person.  I would just pray for them to be happy, joyous and free.  I would also pray for my fear to be removed because in situations like this I can feel fearful and it must be noticable in my interactions with people.

      I pray for a speedy resolution for you.

      [Link Removed] 


      Rg1065733560, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lisa Middlesworth wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Good luck Ang, remain positive! Eventually, she will rub the right person the wrong way. Just be patient, stand your ground professionally, you will come out of this shinning brighter than ever.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Trudy S wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • I wrote about exactly this a couple of months ago:

      When a bully targets you, you have three options :accept the abuse; avoid the bully or escape; and confront or fight back. Confrontation is a better choice than many believe—if you know what you‘re doing.

      Confronting the Work Place Bully I 

      Confronting the Work Place Bully II 

      Hope you find some helpful ideas.


      Isagenixbeliever, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      UK Girl wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Honey I’m sorry this has just not been resolved it sounds like she has bullied everyone and got away with it - I suggest you stand firm - plus how come after 17 years your suddenly getting grief - long service and loyalty should account for something worried




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Myrna Perez wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Your boss is pissed off because you‘re able to defend yourself and not have her bullying you.  What an UNPROFESSIONAL boss you have.  

      You‘re doing everything right—your boss could get in trouble for creating a hostile environment.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • When you made the statement that no one likes her and she is a bully.....that said it all.  Have you been there longer?  If so...you keep doing what you‘re doing.  Be yourself...be nice... be cheerful...and I would always speak to her especially in front of everyone.  (Your witnesses).  If she wants to be the one to act unprofessional, then so be it.  That doesn’t mean you have to act like her.  When you are nice, cheerful, pleasant to be around, always speaks to her...then what can you she ever come back and say about you?  If you are doing your job to the fullest, pleasant to be around, then what can she say?  Let her be the “ass“...not you.  You can go to her and ask if ya’ll can discuss your differences.  If she chooses not to, then it’s her problem.  Document any times you ask to speak to her...and her response.  If anything comes about again...you have some documentation of her behavior.  But I wouldn’t let her run me off.  Sounds like she will eventually hang herself.  I’ve seen it happen numerous times where I work...and they always hang themselves.  Laws make it very hard to just fire someone...so the company you work has to be careful on how they handle her.  But..just remember...the more you document behavior whether it’s writing down dates and times of incidents or taking actual photographs...the better the chance of ceasing an opportunity to get rid of someone who is toxic.  Hope this helps.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • Great advice Annie....especially the email part!  You are so right....




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cheekymonkey wrote Aug 3, 2010
    • heart if you went to your union rep and followed all the necessary procedures, and you know for a fact she was spoken to on this subject ,what she is doing is retaliation. That is extremely illegal in a corporate world more so than the hostile work environment seems like it was like that before. Be very careful for now your boss is not only mean but out to get even due to her feeling threatened (where the retaliating is coming from ) she must have felt threatened by you to begin with. She probably feels inadequate and that’s why she is bullying everyone.
      Keep in mind she might have been instructed not to talk to you, about the complaint she is just going over bourd. Just do your job the way you always do, be professional as you have been in your last 17 years. Do document any conversation you have be very specific in your documentation. If it doesn’t improve in short order, go back to your rep and state ” you feel she is harassing you by retaliating for your first concern where as now you feel your wk environment is hostile and it’s causing you stress. ” you have now hit all the important buzz words that corporations fear. you’ll get action.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angell Villafañe wrote Aug 4, 2010
    • Ladies thank you so much for all the great advice which I really need! Trudy thanks for the link to the articles on workplace bullying which I printed and read...good stuff and great strategies! I was informed by my union rep that there is already a future meeting set up on workplace bullying so she said this is coming at just the right time.

      Mary your suggestion on documenting behavior was so good because that was one of the suggestions of my union rep so I have been keeping a little notebook in my pocketbook with dates and times of incidents.  

      Annie I actually did try to go back to her to see if she wanted to continue the meeting to hopefully resolve the issues but she said she didn’t want to do it. So I think she was informed to not talk to me anymore about it.  

      But now I am getting the silent treatment...she speaks to everyone else in the department...says hello and goodbye to them but not to me. Yesterday she spoke to me very nastily when she asked me to do something and I was informed that she is now creating a hostile work environment and if it continues then the union reps will have to call a meeting with her and her bosses to call attention to it. So I am laying low and just doing my job...but I have to say I am losing sleep over it at night...I don’t like confrontation and I just want this to go away! Thanks again for all the great feedback...I really appreciate it! estatic




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Angell Villafañe wrote Aug 4, 2010
    • Btw Vicki...she has been here only five years and has had several of these incidents with other employees. Her bosses are not fans of hers either so she doesn’t really hold much power. I mentioned to her that she is the first and only boss I’ve had that has ever had a problem with how I do things. She even tried to give me a handwriting lesson one day because she said I didn’t know how to write the number seven! This woman is a piece of work!




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Brimstone1968 wrote Aug 4, 2010
    • All the advise from the ladies were so right on.  This information helped me also.  I am not in that situation but the information was so powerful and practical.  I will be praying for you and the office environment also your health.  Your health is your wealth, if you not happy and not sleeping it can and will only affect every aspect of your life.  I will pray that PEACE abound in this situation.  Love ya and be bless.




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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Mary Clark wrote Aug 4, 2010
    • Hey....Annie is right...take care of you!  Do something at night to relieve some stress.  It will help you..especially with sleeping!  You are doing everything right...lay low, be nice, always speak....and let her hang herself.  The longer she acts the way she is now the quicker it’s going to come to a head!  

      DON‘T LET THIS GIRL ....ROB YOUR JOY IN LIFE!  Just remember that...and say it over and over again...you can’t control her but you can control YOUR REACTION to her!




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