The mountain shows us God’s might,
Shining the Son’s light,
through the clouds the rainbow comes,
Oh, what a beautiful sight!

-by Dana Ellis

My very first book signing is behind me.  All of us fear the unknown, and I was very nervous walking into the doors of the Barnes & Noble store at Happy Valley & I-17.  I stood for a minute at the door of the store and took a deep breath, saying to myself stiffen up girl, be confident!  This is going to go well for you, just put your game face on.  I opened the door with my big smile and dragged my little box of goodies into the store, walking down that long aisle to the customer service stand.  As I was approaching the stand, I saw the man that I was to meet, leaving?oh my?do I run after him, with waving arms or just walk confidently along the aisle like I know exactly what I'm doing?  I chose to walk confidently, approaching the younger version of the man that left the customer service island and stated quietly, "I'm here to see Virgel," knowing full well that he just left.  

The young man at the post looked at me and said, "Well, you just missed him."  

"I know." I replied as sweetly as I could,  "Just wondering if you want me to wait here for his return or should I make my way over to the children's book area, as I am the author here for the story time/book signing?"  

He sighed and got on his little walkie-talkie and said, "Virgel, your author is here."  

Oh boy?not too thrilled about having me, I see?ok this isn't going to be an easy day for me.  

After hearing Virgel's response, he turned back to me and said, "He'll be right out."

Virgel came running out from the back, looking a little hassled.  He apologized for not being ready for me, then proceeded to run around the store looking for a chair and table for the book signing.  Oh no! I thought to myself, this is going to be a disaster!  Before I left the house, I had asked my husband to wait at home until after I had finished reading the story (he always makes me nervous when I do anything in public), but I quickly got on the phone almost in tears and begged him to please come for support.  We only lived a few blocks away and he could be here quickly.  I had come to the store at 10:30 am, which would have given me plenty of time to set everything up before the story time was to start at 11:00 am but now, I feared that with the delay, I would be rushing to get everything together.  I could start to feel my heart beating faster and faster and I was in such a panic as the clock started ticking closer and closer to that 11:00 hour.  Virgel was sweating profusely by now and finally brought a table that was oh, so very small.  I never saw one quite so small. How was I going to fit all of the things, in my box, on that little table?  And sign all of those books, I was going to sell?  By now all of the children and their parents were gathering around the story time area, it was a weekly event at this Barnes & Noble store and they knew the drill.  Virgel?where did you go?  Ok?put that confident smile on your face, Dana?quit panicking.

Finally, a little voice sang out, "Aunt Dana!" and four little arms squeezed my legs.  Both of my grandnieces, Haili & Brenna came running up from behind me and just held on.  They don't even know how much I needed that hug, right at that moment, on that first day of meeting my public.  But there they were the two of them with their sweet little smiles and happy-to-see me hugs!  It was the best moment of the day for me, especially since right behind them came my husband who wrapped his arms around me knowing exactly what I needed him to do when he saw me!  Then we got down to business.

By then, Virgel, had found me a chair to sit in for story time. While I sat down in the story time chair and comfortably slid back into the roll of schoolteacher, I started to share the story of "Jeremiah, the Dragon Persuader".  My husband got to work on the tiny table that Virgel had  set up draped with a blue tablecloth, making it look nice with a dish of candy.  He had lovingly made a "Meet the Author Poster" for me the day before and sat that beside the table on a stand that was suppose to hold books about other dragons, he put those other dragon books aside and instead added all of my books to the stand that sat next to the tiny table, took all of the extra things out to the car to get them out of the way and got the camera ready to take pictures to record the day.  Once again, he came to my rescue and helped make it a very special day.

My audience was a little younger than the book was written for, but they were excited about the story and were quite exuberant while I turned each page.  As I read the story and acted silly, the kids and parents alike laughed with me (or at me) and when the story was finished everyone clapped.  There was a cute little girl, sitting in the front, Abigail.  I will never forget Abigail, because she wanted to see the pictures first, even before I had finished reading each of the pages.  I joked, "Abigail, I think your mommy needs to buy you the book!"  

The audience was full of friendly faces, I had taken the advice of one of the other authors off of Jerry's website and invited friends and family. I had my mother and father-in-law, sister-in-laws, nieces and nephews, friends, colleagues.  They in turn invited their friends, etc.  As I was reading the story, I caught the eyes of loved ones and it helped to boost my courage. Especially when during the most crucial part of the story, a little girl blurted out "but fire comes out of a dragon's mouth, not his nose!"  Everyone held their breath as I continued to read the story? I just smiled at the little girl and agreed with her? knowing Smokey, my dragon, sneezed and fire came out of his nose accidentally? is what made my story unique, knowing the audience understood, was what made the experience worthwhile. Even the store clerk was cheering me on as I read the story.

After we were through with story time, I made my way over to the table and was so surprised at what my husband had lovingly done with the area reserved for signing, I once again remembered why I had married him!  I sat down, started signing books (did anyone ever mention how hard it is to concentrate on spelling other people's names? And what is with all the different forms of spelling the same name?!), gave away lots of candy, bookmarks and packets of seeds (in Smokey, the dragon's honor).  My goal was to sell more than eight books. Why eight, you ask?  Well, once again after reading one of the author's first book signings, she had sold eight books.  I had set my goal at selling more than eight, I'm very competitive, you see.  That day, I sold 18 books.  I made it!  Yippee!!

While things became quiet, Virgel, came over and sat to talk with me.  He turned out to be a very nice man.  I'm always interested in learning about other people.  He told me a lot about his background.  While he has always worked in managerial positions, he loves working with children. He volunteers at the Crisis Nursery in Phoenix.  He has adopted children from the Crisis Nursery.  That surprised me.  He also serves on the Board of Education for the Cave Creek School District.  He likes to arrange story time for the school district and have characters act out the stories while he reads to the children.  Last year he chose to read Clifford, the Big Red Dog.  So, we talked about his exploits with Clifford the big Red Dog.  He was quite funny, when he wasn't running around trying to find a chair and a table.  I really enjoyed my talk with him and he even invited me back to the store for the Educator Appreciation Night in October.  I felt good about the experience. As I was leaving the store, the store clerk who had been cheering me on as I read the story, gave a big wave and said, "You did great for a first time author!"  Hearing her say those words meant the world to me, I needed to hear that from a bookseller.  The little baby steps are what it takes in this business, at least that is what I'm learning. Now that it was over I felt much more confident.  Having my husband by my side carrying my poster and candy dish out the door, I thought this turned out to be a great day!

I just got off of the phone with my good friend Mary.  Mary is 88 years old.  She is amazing.  She just told me that she was sorry she hadn’t called me sooner because she had been sick!  I last saw Mary at my June Margarita/Swimming Party (see photos).  While life tends to make us all busy, why does Mary feel the need to apologize to me for not calling?  I think it must be because I recently sent out a newsletter to everyone who was at the party, therefore, she must feel obligated to make a gesture in return.  My intent was not to make Mary feel guilty by sending out a newsletter, nor anyone else for that matter, but she out of everyone felt the need to pick up the phone and call.  Whatever the reason, I love talking with Mary, because now we have a date next week to have lunch and go shopping.

She is going to see her grandaughter in Northern California at the end of August and then fly up to Portland, OR, where she used to live with her adorable husband, John (he passed away last November), for a long visit with friends of hers that have asked her to come and stay.  You see John was in the Coast Guard and when he passed away last November, she went up to toss his ashes in the water off the Pacific Coast with the Coast Guard, however, the weather was not cooperating and she was unable to do so, at the time.  She had to come back to Arizona, and the Coast Guard, did it without her, they however, sent her a large map of the ocean with actual longitudinal coordinates of where they laid him to rest.  So, I think she is feeling the tug at her heartstrings to go back and say a last farewell.  

She hasn’t been feeling well herself. She has suffered with infection after infection since he passed on, yet she continues to go here and there and zips through life in her little PT Cruiser.  Driving much better than I actually do.  She is quite a safe driver and handles her car very well.  She doesn’t really care what people think of her wearing a hearing aid, because she is really interested in what you have to say, darn it!  So, wait for her to put it in so that she can hear every last word.  

As we were hanging up the phone, she said, “I wanted to tell you how much I love you, if I hadn’t expressed that thought to you yet. You are very special to me, Dana“.  That meant everything to me!  Hearing her say those words, because I told her, “I feel the same about you, Mary“.  Yes, my new friend Mary...amazing that she would apologize for not calling sooner!  I’m so glad she did.

My Own Story
By Dana Ellis

One day out of desperation (and I truly mean desperation), I thought now what?  I am 45 years old, I am very sick and I don't have any way of taking care of myself should something happen to my husband, my marriage or my living arrangements (which includes the other two items in this sentence).  At the time things were not going so well with any of those things in my life. I remembered that I had written a story for my son, Jeremy, when he was only nine years old.  So, I found that large creative looking book I had bought at Michael's over a decade ago, with thoughts of writing stories for him one summer to illustrate.  You see, he loves to draw and is really quite talented in that respect and being the great mother that I was, I had bought that really big book with good intentions, but now he was 22 years old, and what did he need it for anyway, right?  I found the story, Jeremiah, the Dragon Persuader safely in the pages of that large creative looking book, but it wasn't quite finished.  I hadn't put an end to it and I never had given it to Jeremy to actually illustrate?ok, I know I was a much better mom than that, I guess I was just very busy living life with such a delightful boy!   So, I finished the story and started to research publishing companies on the web.

There are a lot of companies who publish books for you on the web.  A lot of them will gladly take your money.  Some even want as much as $20,000.00 to get the ball rolling and you will be stuck with 1,000,000 books to sell to all of your friends and relatives.  How disappointing all of it seemed!  Not to mention overwhelming to someone who is suffering from fibromyalgia and severe migraines.  Oh, not to mention depression which I have been treated for continually, while seeking the right doctors to find out what has really been going on with this body of mine!  So, on the good days I finally found a little publishing company out of Mustang, OK, Tate Publishing Company.  I really liked Tate Publishing Company because they were a Christian based company.  While they also wanted money for up-front cost (it was very small compared to others), they seemed to be respectable and detailed what they would do with my money and when I would receive it all back should the book sell a certain amount of copies.   Now if I can just find 5,000 best friends.   I sent my little story off to them in January of 2007 and in April of 2007 I received a contract from them saying they loved the characters and would like to work with me to put the story into a book form! Voila?we have Jeremiah, the Dragon Persuader.  The process was a whole year in the making but a learning experience I would not give up.  

Did I mention I have a degree in Elementary Education?  I no longer teach those little first graders, but I sure miss being around children.  I don't miss teaching or being in the public school system (I even taught in the private sector for half of a year ? which is another hilarious story all by itself)!  However, when I received my copies of Jeremiah, the Dragon Persuader, I went into the classroom and read to the children for the first time in ten years, the memories all came flooding back.  I missed the fun of brainstorming teaching strategies with colleagues. I missed the joy of children discovering something new.  I missed the joy of discovering something new!    

Here is where I end my essay?because I am still on my journey at 46 of discovering new and wonderful things.  Having the courage on that dark, dark day to try something new for myself! I am not sure where it is going to lead but I have made a lot of new friends along the way! My husband and I have come to new understandings and brighter days and my son, Jeremy, is on his way to becoming a great adult!  I am discovering life after 40?is neither so dark nor desperate!