I feel so sad,depressed,moody,insomniac,low appetite, and disconnected. periods are erratic,heavy and short. I am unhappy about my eating habits and am getting out of shape quickly but dont have ambition to get off my tired butt to care,which makes me more upset at myself! my blood pressure is up and down,more up lately. lots of changes going on with my family,trying to keep up and stay focused. A few stresses are my son turning 3, my daughter turning 21 while at Air Force base, other daughter becoming a junior and bugging me about driving, visiting Mom and family in Ga. in July, the end of this school year at a school I like. my husband kids around about my getting old enough for menopause,which i dont think is at all funny! He has gotten out of shape himself and we have been drifting apart lately. i want to care but just dont want to put the effort in  it after all the past twenty years of a rollercoaster ride.
maybe after a few weeks of vacation with my family will help get me out of this awful funk.

 I just needed to get that off my mind. Thanks ~ Lori

 It’s funny how we see ourselves when we‘re young. On top of the world,free to make our own choices,throwing caution to the wind. Then,kids come along and we find most of what we do revolves around how it will effect them.

 When my daughter was born nearly 21 years ago,I was so young and intimidated by how much I really didn’t know about caring for a newborn. No amount of babysitting prepared me for being a Mom and caring for her 24/7. I held her and imagined how she’d one day run and play,ride a bike,laugh at my jokes. Now she’s old enough to drive,make her own flight plans,and she is the one who makes me laugh.

 My second daughter has always been strong willed. A debater from the start. Everything has been a challenge. I often wondered how quiet it would be once she goes off on her own.Now that she’s turning 16,she wants to learn to drive, and she says she’s ready to date. Wait,how can my little munchkin be ready for those things already?She already plans to attend college and go off into Life full speed ahead. Wait,isn’t she the one I was looking forward to fleeing the nest? Now am holding on to every day we have and try not to nag her,but that has always been our communication.She loves the challenge.

 My little guy will be 4 this summer and he is much like her,very strong willed. I think having her prepared me for him.lol. I am so much more confident and know how to handle the stubbornness better. He is so full of energy and action! He still cuddles with me,loves to read Hop On Pop,and truck books.I love rediscovering the world through his eyes.  

  I hug them all as often as I can and tell them often that I love them. We flash the hand sign for I love you to each other. I often feel sad that they‘re growing up,but know that we have done the best we can to help them be confident,strong,kind people in all situations. My oldest daughter recently passed the National EMT registry course in the Air Force Guard. My second(born to be the second child) is involved in the church worship team on drums, and my son,well,he wants to be a fireman hero and save people.

 It’s an interesting and busy life,but I love every bit of it :)