Negativity can literally overwhelm your marriage.  With our fast paced society and the extreme demands hitting us from every side, more and more couples find negativity taking over their marriage.  Once the negativity starts, you need an immediate injection of positivity into your relationship before it is too late.  

Even couples with successful marriages experience periods of negativity.  Our interviews with thousands of happily married couples in 48 countries,  revealed the 5 tips these longtime successfully married couples use to keep their relationships positive.  Here are 5 tips you can use to stop the negativity in your marriage:  

1. Take an honest look at what YOU could do differently to improve your marriage relationship .  Could you stop gripping about your job, or spend more time with your spouse, or take more interest in his hobbies, or stop pointing out his weaknesses or talk more openly about what is bothering you?  

2. Avoid saying these five statements when dealing with a marital crisis:  

     • It's your fault! Sometimes, a financial decision goes bad or your child gets in trouble at school.  Blame doesn't work!

     • I told you so! These four words are rarely ever used in successful marriages.

     • Saying "I am upset with you about this or that . . ." in a public setting.  

     • Why do you always . . . Focusing on your spouse's weakness rather than building on their strengths will only increase their weakness and diminish their strength.  

     • Ask for your spouse's opinion and then do the opposite.  

3. Repair your balance and your spirit.  Take the steps to get healthy mentally and physically.  You can't turn off the negativity when you are in an unhealthy state.  You need to heal yourself first.

4. Each and everyday successful couples build positive interactions with each other.   Begin your interactions with positive comments.  Comment on something your spouse has done that was good, helpful or kind.  Notice the small things and make a nice comment about him.  If your spouse begins a conversation with a negative comment or is upset, don't jump down his throat with a negative response.  Bite your tongue and wait to comment until you can turn your thoughts into a positive comment.  It is amazing how often an entire conversation can be changed with a positive comment.

5. Appreciate what you have!   If you have good health, a place to live, or a job, you already have more than most people in the world.  Focus on the positives.  Talk openly about them.  Your happiness will begin putting the spark back in the relationship.

Remember, getting out of a negative spiral begins with one positive action, then another, until a habit of positive actions is built in your relationship.

[Link Removed] in love and marriage. Love well!

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By Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz
America's #1 [Link Removed] 

**Today, you can see how you stack up to the best marriages around the world.  Take the [Link Removed] to assess your chances of achieving a successful marriage of your own.

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