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Labor and Delivery. They say you forget the pain. HA! Well maybe I don't remember fully the physical pain but I do remember lying there with piggyback contractions, no time for meds and literally screaming while my husband pats my hand and repeatedly says, "You're OK, you're fine." Hmmm. 'This is just doesn't seem fair", I thought. Actually all the way back in high school, I didn't see my brothers bent over in pain once a month and again, it just didn't seem fair!

I've always been somewhat of a crusader for justice. This usually takes place in the confines of my own head and within my circle of relationships, but nonetheless in the order of my perceptions, all should be just and fair or I feel disturbed and unarranged.

So here I am in menopause and as I voice my sometimes-daily list of complaints, my husband usually stares at me blankly and often just leaves the room! I once heard the remark; "It seems like there is something wrong with you everyday". Well gee, excuse me if for the past couple nights, I drenched the bed, didn't sleep and am now am in a foul mood. I'll say it again," It just doesn't seem fair!"

Now, I know there is a long list that my husband could hold up in front of my face regarding the things I will never know or understand about what men have to encounter in their lives so....

Welcome to Planet Sweet Pea! It is here we will take a brief visit into the world of our loved ones to better understand and learn what they may encounter during their life changes.

And the first in our series is of course, "Blitzed by Menopause". I thought that maybe if we could get our husbands/partners to sit down and watch an entertaining and informative DVD about menopause, we could bridge the "midlife-what-the heck-is-going-on-here" gap a bit and strengthen our partnerships during this change.

My main intent really, for those of us who experience some or all of the symptoms of menopause (there are reportedly over 30! [Link Removed]), was to let our husbands/partners know that this is real and we are not making it up when we feel so hot we are near combustion, or agitated with how they chew!

I have to tell you that the validation I felt as my husband became aware of the facts on menopause from Dr. Tori Hudson ( was empowering! I learned a lot as well as Dr. Hudson provides the most comprehensive and understandable explanation on Hormone Replacement Therapy I have heard to date!

But how about learning relationship tools for our coupleships during these menopausal years? More to come my friends. Please, I would love to hear your experiences with menopause, how it has affected your relationships and for that small percentage of you that pass through this time of life with little or no just doesn't seem fair! But God bless you anyway!

Janbrehm123, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.


Member Comments

    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Nov 5, 2009
    • I’m in the thick of it. It can be horrible at times. I’m using bio identical hormone creams but for some reason it seems to not be working as well as it was when I started. I went off of them for awhile but I’ve been back on them long enough I believe to be getting some relief.

      Sometimes my husband is supportive and sometimes he seems to be sick of hearing about it. So I don’t always tell him when I’m miserable.

      The other day, though, he walked into my dressing area to find me wrapped in a towel, with tears streaming down my face and having the worst hot flash I’ve had to date. I couldn’t finish getting dressed because every pore had opened up. He rushed to put a large fan in the room, sat me down in a chair, kissed my forehead and let me have my privacy. That was a lovely thing to do.

      I guess I’m just happy that some day this will all come to an end. I’m throwing a party when that day comes.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Lazylola wrote Nov 7, 2009
    • I’ve got nobody to torture with my menopause, except for my kids, and they largely ignore my complaints, until I blast the AC and it is 30 degrees outside. estatic

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