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     A millennia from now when anthropologist from the planetoid Zercon raffle through the clutter of our consummated civilization, they will marvel at some things, shake their pointed heads at others and stand totally bewildered by a few more. One such representation of our brief squat on this planet will be our wearing attire through the ages. But, of all those remnants of apparel, none will mystify them more than the iconic 'ball cap'.  

     A hat, cover, lid, topper, or chapeau that was worn by many in everyday life. During sports, recreation, on the job, and while having sex in Alabama. Of all the evidence offered to these cosmic scientist, none would be more revealing and representative of our species that the old fashion ball cap.  

     In 1860 the Brooklyn Excelsior baseball team were the first to wear ball caps which eventually evolved into the caps we don today. When I was a teen, few of my buds wore ball caps, mostly we just wore Brylcreem. But during the eighties and well into the 21st century, ball caps became both fashionable and symbolic. Many never take them off wearing them from morning till night, around the house, out into the world, at funerals, weddings, etc. I believe it's because they are afraid of galactic gamma rays and the caps are foil lined to protect their thin skulls. There are those, sadly, who wear their lids at the dinner table and out in restaurants as a liberal protest for individualism and crude manners. There are also those who wear their caps with the bill pointing backwards. These sophisticated fashion beast have a convoluted sense of direction or they just want people to think they are walking backwards.  

     Then there are those who wear the cap's bill cocked to the side of their head. This often results from a paint sniffing prenatal mother, which also explains rappers and why they can't keep their paints up. The wearing of a ball cap can represent many things to many people. Often the cap will bear a logo of something significant to the wearer, such as a sport's team, political mantra or golden arches. Now, I do own a ball cap, and wear it every time I go out to shade my bald head from the Florida sun and seagull shit. It was given to me by two of my grandsons. It simply says, "Old Farts Need Love Too." I get very emotional when I wear it.

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