Life is a lot like sleeping with a goat. Sometimes your life can really stink, and other times it feels all fluffy and warm. They're called ups and downs, peaks and valleys, or  sleeping with goats. A phone call, knock at the door, or the simple maneuver of opening your mailbox can change your life as quick as a Mexican condor swooping in and ripping your head off.

     Now, in my 'blue plate special' years, I have seen, heard, and experienced it all. Life changers and bowel disrupters. It all starts with; "Yes, we're expecting!!"....then later...."Okay, I'm pregnant again." Months will then flush by as you rear two milk guzzling crapping machines who are more interested in the ability to swallow small objects than they are in you. As teens, you pray your daughter will abstain from breeding until she's eighteen, and you hope the love of your son's life isn't named Ralph. Sooner or later they leave the nest and plunge into the real world of social raptors and chemically sustained relationships. Soon, they are ravaged and disillusioned by this real world and rush back to the nest and once again take up lodging in their old bedrooms; which one is now converted into a play dungeon with a hanging trapeze, and the other room is where mom now shelves her collection of salt and pepper shakers from around the world.  

     In time this set back is resolved and once again they leave with a financial enhancement from dad. Your world is now recovering from that setback and all is good again. It is here that the two of you breach middle age. It is also here that you find yourselves sliding down the mountain of superficial beauty and machismo and into the valley of treadmills and comb-over's. Gravity now dominates both your physiques and as you lose hair, she starts to sprout it. But, life is still good.  

     Now you lumber into the valley of your sixties along with the loss of eyesight and teeth. Your lifestyle is now more about bingo and descent bowel movements. Your doctors become your confidants and the pharmacist your best friend. You view the younger generations as deviants and mindless welfare liberals who spend all their time  stoned and fornicating. You find yourself arguing with FOX news every night and debating politics with the dog. You spend hours surfing the TV channels looking for your favorite shows, only to find out they were cancelled five years ago. But, life is still good.  

     So....if you think positively about life, and where your journey has brought you, you soon realize how you have survived. The peaks and valleys are often defined by you and the one you love. It's when the sound of your spouse's voice becomes music, when their every movement a dance, their smile pure laughter, and finally, when every embrace becomes a celebration of life. Yes, life is still good, especially with a hot 68 year old Wifey!