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I just found out recently that I have been cheated on by my husband. We are going on 28 years of marriage in October. At first I thought it was only for the past 3 years but after discussing (for some reason I need to know everything about it) I found out that he has been “friends” with her for 7-8 years and in a physical relationship for more like 4-5 years. I cannot wrap my head around the fact that it went on for that long, when I thought my life was fine (not perfect by any means) but happy!! I look back and question my entire life now.
I love my husband and want to work through this - am I crazy??
Yes I am very hurt, having panic attacks, etc. But I still want to be with him. He has cut off all ties to her at this point. But for some reason I haven’t broken down and confronted him like you would think I should. Am I holding it all in, how can I deal with this so it won’t come out later?
Has anyone been in this position? Suggestions?
Hello Krussell1,
First let me say I’m so sorry you had to deal with adultery in your marriage. 2ndly No you are not crazy for wanting to keep trying in your marriage. I too had to deal with adultery in my 1st marriage he was a repeat cheater and after the 3rd time I threw in the towel to keep myself from serving time in prison, because I did want to kill him, hell I practically attempted to but he never pressed charges or called the police. Dear one let go and let God! If you are a woman of faith give your marriage to the Lord, He is the author of marriage between a man and his wife. I know it can be hard trust me like I said been there done that! But God can heal your marriage if the two of you allow Him to as well as both of you putting in the work to make it work, and re-build the trust. Have you sought counseling? If he refuses then you go for YOU! Trust me it helps. Go to a support group trust me there are more people than you know going through the same thing, don’t feel alone in this get some help if not both of you at least for yourself. Pray and ask God to heal your heart towards your husband, help you to be able to trust him again. Read your bible and pray it helps. Well if you’d like to chat more just send me a message here, I’m a listen ear. God bless you.
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