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I live in Southern California and am struggling to meet quality men.  I have never been married-but would like to be someday.  I find that alot of men that i meet, my banker, my mechanic etc..are all wanna be actors.  It’s fine to have a dream.  But they are so focused on their acting career, they do not want to think seriously about a relationship.  I have tried online dating many times.  Still no success.  Church and bars!  has not worked.  Any other suggestions?  I’m a great gal.  I have a good job.


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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Feathermaye wrote Sep 7, 2008
    • My suggestion is to stop looking so hard!

      Most times, we never find what we want/need if we‘re actively pursuing it.

      My experience is that when you stop expecting something fabulous, you‘re bound to receive just that!

      If you‘re determined to explore the deeper end of the dating pool, though, you might consider finding a new hobby. Book clubs, adult athletics and the like are great places to meet people. Besides, you just might discover a craft or activity that you love in the process!

      Good luck!

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Cynthia Schmidt wrote Sep 7, 2008
    • I agree with the idea of hobbies and activities to meet someone with common interests. Here the dating pool is even narrower than southern cal. I have a friend who found herself single, in her late fifties and feeling like there was no hope. I suggested she take up golf, it’s a big sport here. She lives on a golf course which made it even more convenient. Well she did and her golfing girlfriends kept getting her out on the course.

      Long story short, she’s been enjoying a really lovely relationship for the past 3 months now. She’s just beaming!

      Make a list of all the things you like to do and the places you like to go and make them a regular stop in your routine. It’s bound to happen for you!

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Perl wrote Sep 7, 2008
    • One of the best advice I ever heard, after I got married, was “marry your self first” from Sark in her book Wild, Succulent Women. What it means is that you need to have a great relationship with your self first and many things will fall into place. I think it will add to your magnetism and attraction, suzieq10. Enjoy yourself and who you are and do what you like to do, and see what crosses your path. (i didn’t do it this way, lol, but i wish you lotsa luck!) hugs.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Stephanie wrote Sep 7, 2008
    • I completely understand you- the men in (especially la) are all convinced that they are g-d sent actors and were meant to be famous.

      These men are arrogant and could not care about anyone more than themselves.

      Depending on where you live, I would go outside the box. If you live in La- visit SD, even with some girlfriends for a weekend and meet men there (they are not “actors“).

      Or fly up to SF- there are a lot of great people there who accept you for who you are and are not judgmental (not like they are in la anyways).

      Travel- try different places, and relax- try not to look so hard, they will come to you : )

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Trudy S wrote Sep 8, 2008
    • I met my now husband through a matchmaking service.  Yes, I did no less.

      I was ready to settle down.  I wasn’t meeting the kind of men I wanted to meet.  I needed help.  I got it.

      I am now married 8 years with a WONDERFUL husband that is a perfect match for me and a FANTASTIC 4-year old son.  I’m 43.

      It probably wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t ‘given-in’ and asked for help.

      I hope that story helps...just my personal experience.

      [Link Removed] 

      Isagenixbeliever, Your links have been removed, please consider upgrading to premium membership.

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Saggyboobs@40 wrote Sep 26, 2008
    • Do you have any specific interests that you can meet men?
      or ever consider moving away from California? It’s a rather “me me me state“... just a thought :)

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    • 0 votes vote up vote up

      Jgirl1331 wrote Dec 31, 2008
    • Someone mentioned visit San Diego. DON“ down here are just as bad as the ones in LA.  Southern California is not the place to meet quality men.  They are mostly into the young 20 somethings or just making money.

      Northern California is more “real“.  The lifestyle is much different and the people are more down to earth.

      I agree with the suggestions of don’t look so hard and find activities that you enjoy.  You will meet many really great people and perhaps a nice man along the way1

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